On Closing Your Church

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This past weekend at my church we had our final church service. It’s something that makes my heart very heavy and I’m still trying to process through all the emotions that come with it. I cried during the church service on Sunday – just the very gravity of realizing this was the end, that it was the last time we were going to worship in this place, it’s something that hits you hard and fast.

It just feels like the end. It feels very permanent. Somehow God kept us in that building for five years and so, in some part, I thought (naively?) that He would continue to keep us in the building. I couldn’t face the ending of this place. I know it’s just a building, but it has a lot of meaning to me. It’s the place where we got married. My son was baptized there. I’ve had so many memories in that building – murder mysteries, good food, great fellowship, and lots of friends.

Sometimes I am even angry. Why is it that we couldn’t figure out a way to keep the building? Why is it that we have so little support for campus ministry in Milwaukee? Does anyone care? Sometimes I feel that way. But I know God has a plan and that in his infinite wisdom, He will make a new way known for His work to be done here.

And part of the sadness is, where do we go from here? Our church wasn’t perfect, but it was an excellent fit for us. Nowhere brought me greater joy. As someone said during the band’s prayer before worship, it’s been the one place I’ve looked forward to going to every week. When school got me down, I knew I would find joy and laughter and smiles and a refugee there. That was my safe space. And now my safe space is gone and where do I go from there?

So on Sunday we’ll start looking for a new church. No easy task – as I think my husband and I envision things that are a bit different in our church. But God hasn’t failed us yet and I know we’ll find a new place. But I also know it won’t be the same.

Disclosure: This post may contain links which will generate a small amount of income from clicking them. You should feel no pressure to click them, but if you do, I appreciate your support. I’m just trying to pitch in and help my family in whatever small ways I can. 

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